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Monday, September 28, 2009

Some big big news!

Hello again finally! I have many many things to cover so bear with me. This summer has hosted some of the most hurtful things and some of the most revieling things. I have learned so much about myself and some of my "friends". I would like to share some of these things. I learned that truly church is not a building but who fills it. We have been battling all summer with some situations in our lives that is life altering to say the least. My sis and her husband went out and started up a resturant. They have spent countless hours working together and of course the issues that goes with spending every moment together. Its just not for some. They have survived and hapily, so has their relationship. The pain starts here! Of course when you belong to a church and you start towards trials and troubles, you call on these folks to help out either by prayer or physical help. Naturally we did ask for prayers but each Sunday became another judgement day. If you will recall in an earlier post I put that I had found the scripture that speaks of grace exteded instead of judgement. Well, this is where doing the background on that verse would help. See it says that a person who has done some pretty bad things ask for forgivness and God grants it. Then another who has not done so much "bad" things ask for forgivness and gets it. Out of the two, who do you think is most grateful for forgivness? Obviously the one who would be most grateful would be the one who had the most forgiven. This judgement we recieved was by the ones who may not have had as much grace extended so they didnt feel the need to give much grace either. Once a person gets away from the truth that we have all come short of all we could do to give to God, you start to leave cracks in the door of your heart to allow even more bitterness and envy and greed and well all the things the devil is. Soon it gets easier and easier to harbor and nurture these types of feelings. Then of course what is in your heart starts to make an appearence. I do not want anyone who reads this to think I am or have ever thought I am above this very same thing happening to me. Actually, I know the routine because it did happen to me several years ago. Anyways, once their hearts were filled and spilling over all the hateful, manipulative junk there was some things done and said that became more than some of us could take. We realized and we walked away from our home church and the building that held it. The church was a group of 30+ people and everyone but 8 left. I believe by staying I was encouraging their misdeeds. Nonetheless, I have been where they are and even though they feel like they "won" this battle, I know in my heart, because of where I have been myself, that they are miserable. Proud, but miserable! I have spent my summer begging God to take away the bitterness, anger, and hatefulness out of me towards them because I cannot be of service to God if I am doing what they did. I do feel so much better in my faith now that most of that meaness is out of my heart. I learned just how hard it truly is to extend grace to those who despitefully use you. I did learn it though and I have been praying for them that they too would recieve a revelation and beg God to take away their meaness. In this process, though very painful, we have found a church we adore. So far and what we have heard, there is no judgement from these people. They care and they love and they try to serve God with all they have. I can hardly wait till the next service. I couldn't say that about the other church for a few years now.
I know there are hopefully some folks reading this who maybe has been through the same thing or are going through the same kind of situation. I beg of you, dont leave that church and God. Ask God to lead you where you can get away from the bitterness and those folks. Then sit back and watch God pick you up and take you to an even better place. Thats what we did and It feels so good to be surrounded by people who love God and each other. There is a place where there is no judgement just grace! I promise!
Amy

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